"HOW TO BE A GOOD FATHER"

June 21     How To Be A Good Father   Proverbs 22:6

Good morning and HAPPY FATHER’S DAY from Pastor Glen Brock, Baptist Tabernacle Church, Wendell, North Carolina…
Train up a child in the way he should go: And when he is old, he will not depart from it.   Proverbs 22:6 So many, of the sermons on Father’s Day, deal with “What Is A Good Father?” That is good to ponder, but today, I want to go a little deeper. I want to deal with “How to Be A Good Father”. It’s not enough just to know the characteristics of a good father … we need to see what we need to do, to BE a good father. First, you must “LOVE YOUR WIFE:! What I am about to tell you may seem a bit harsh or even cruel, however, I learned a valuable lesson about how to treat my wife!  I was 16 years old and Mama and I were having one of those teenager discussions where I thought I was right and Mama KNEW that she was right, so, I made a mistake!  I said something (to this day, I do not remember what I said), and it made Mama cry.  Before I knew what was happening, Daddy had me by the collar and against the wall and what he said to me, at that moment, has stayed with me.  He said, “Son, I love you with all of my heart and I would lay down my life for you, but that is my wife and no one speaks to her that way, not even you!”  Wow!  Your children watch how you treat their mother.  Ephesians 5:28 – “So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself;”  HOW TO BE A GOOD FATHER … Love your wife! Secondly, “DON’T EXPECT PERFECT CHILDREN!”   Just like there are no perfect fathers … there are no perfect children … Fathers, don’t EXPECT your children to be perfect (by the way, this may come as a shock: YOUAREN’T PERFECT EITHER!). Don’t expect them to meet all of your expectations … to fulfill all of your goals for them … to be what you want them to be. It’s natural for a child to make mistakes … spill their milk … accidentally break things … do poorly on a test … get angry … They’re not perfect … like YOU were when you were a kid! ACCEPT your children for who they are … whether they are clumsy or athletic … scatterbrained or brainy … shy or a motor-mouth … goofy or sophisticated … Instead of constantly criticizing their imperfections, acknowledge their imperfections … and love them. They aren’t perfect … they will never be perfect … don’t expect them to be perfect.
HOW TO BE A GOOD FATHER … Don’t expect perfect children.
The third is to “ENJOY YOUR CHILDREN!” Psalm 127:3 says, “Behold, children are a gift of the Lord; The fruit of the womb is a reward.” Children are given to us to ENJOY … not to be a burden … not to avoid … not to ignore … BUT TO ENJOY! In order to ENJOY them, you’ve got to be with them … have fun with them … share your life with them. None of this: “The QUALITY of time is more important than the QUANTITY of time.” The QUANTITY of time you spend with them tells them how important they are to you … whether they are just an afterthought … or an inconvenience … or a disruption in your busy schedule. Don’t just give them your leftovers. Enjoy being a father … and make sure that they enjoy having you as their father. HOW TO BE A GOOD FATHER … Enjoy your children.  Next is to “LISTEN TO YOUR CHILDREN!” Give them your undivided attention … not with one eye on the TV and the other eye on them. When they have a problem … when they are worried … when they are sad … when they are lonely … they don’t need cartoons, or a video game, or their best friends Dad … they need YOU! Get involved with your children, and know what’s going on in their everyday life.  Two days after Kayla was born, Daddy told me another “You Better Remember” tip for being a good Daddy!  He said, “Son, just remember that you are going to have to hear things that you don’t want to hear in order to hear the things that you need to hear!”  No truer words have ever been spoken! Proverbs 1:5 –“A wise man will hear and increase in learning.” HOW TO BE A GOOD FATHER … Listen to your children.
You have to “PROVIDE FOR YOUR CHILDREN”  1 Tim. 5:8 – “But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith, and is worse than an unbeliever.” … you can’t be a GOOD FATHER and not provide for your children. HOW TO BE A GOOD FATHER … provide for your children.  You have to “TRAIN YOUR CHILDREN!”  Ephesians 6:4 – “And, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” We must teach and train our children to respect authority in the home … or they won’t respect authority at school or in the world. We need to teach our children that there are BOUNDARIES … rules & regulations … a line that they will not cross. Train your children to respect authority. Earn their respect … be consistent … discipline them with love … or they will never respect the authority of God in their life. HOW TO BE A GOOD FATHER … train your children. You have to “PRAY FOR YOURSELF,” and “PRAY FOR YOUR CHILDREN!” Psalm 55:17 – “Evening, and morning, and at noon, will I pray, and cry aloud: and he shall hear my voice.” You can’t be with your children all the time … God can. You can’t protect them wherever they go … God can. You can teach them right from wrong, but you can’t be there when it’s put to the test … God can. Pray for your children! Lift them up to God to do for them what you can’t do. As parents, we aren’t perfect, and we make mistakes. If we had to do it all over again, we would do things differently. Maybe we’ve done the best we could … we did what we thought was right … we raised our children the best we knew how. NOW … PRAY FOR THEM … because your Heavenly Father loves them as much as you do … and He has more experience than you do. HOW TO BE A GOOD FATHER … pray for your yourself and your children.  You have to be “A POSITIVE ROLE MODEL!” Proverbs 22:6 - “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” You are a role model for your children … like it or not … good or bad … they will, to one degree or another, model their lives after you. I never heard my father, in word or deed, say to me, “Do what I say, not as I do!” You ARE a role model … a good father will be a GOOD role model.  Lastly, You must “PREPARE YOUR CHILDREN!” Proverbs 23:24 says; “The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice, And he who begets a wise son will be glad in him.” I hope you are preparing your children to leave home!!  Someday, they’ll take what they’ve learned from you, and begin to apply it out in the real world. You’ve only got approximately 18 years to get them ready. Preparing them for life away from you is only part of the picture. If you haven’t spent your time preparing them for eternity, you have failed as a father. God didn’t give you your children just to prepare a doctor, a teacher, or a computer programmer. God gave your children to Christian fathers to prepare them for eternity. You can’t choose which eternal path they will take … but you SURELY CAN choose to show them the way to Heaven … OR … you can choose to just ignore their spiritual destiny. They have to decide for themselves the path they’ll take … but you can have a Godly influence on their choice.  I am grateful for a Father that was there for me, was swift to discipline, was an example of a good husband, was a praying man and was a role model for me and did the best that he knew how to prepare me for eternity!  HOW TO BE A GOOD FATHER … prepare your children … for eternity. THANK YOU DADDY for being the Father that you were, so that I could be the Father that I am!  What God does with you, depends upon what you do!  It Always has; It Always will!! Be sure, be productive and continue to share the Love of God with others!  Daddy, remember to listen, to love, to discipline and to be what you are supposed to be and understand that we are not perfect, however, we should be dedicated to being the best Father that is humanly possible!  The rewards are beyond words… To God Be the Glory!  Stay Strong, Stay Focused…Remember, THE BEST IS YET TO BE!